I understand why. I have experienced just about all the same things if I am honest.

I had once offered to line is all up by the door so he could check our underwear. Whatever I did wear when we went out he would usually snear at.

“Is that what you’re wearing?”

My most common phrase in the bedroom until he had switched off was “Get off me!”The bruise on my arms often occurred when he was forceful.

Everything had needed to be on his terms when he wanted it, Like everything else he had to be in control.

My pent up anger at being controlled came out at times!

We had separate sides in the wardrobe. He would never leave mine alone, I felt I was not allowed anything that was mine, He would not leave my gardening shoes alone even though he had his own, I bought pink ones to try to stop him. Our son had also got frustrated with this behaviour. He may have even been the first one to get pink ones to try to get him to leave them alone. My daughter’s shoes were too small fortunately for her. Everything and everybody in the house belonged to him.

I remember him making a point in one of our videos of saying, This is (my name)various things in the kitchen, I know now I was being guilt-tripped for staking a claim on anything at all.

He had got understandably exasperated over the shed. I was the one who did most of the gardening so I did end up kind of taking over the shed. I had felt guilty about it after he had left and had started to tidy it up for him but then to my surprise, I had fallen in love with the shed. He never saw how hard I had worked on it. I had thought he was going to be made miraculously different due to the enforced counselling and come home healed.

I was really happy after a bit of counselling had helped me to live in the moment. I was so much happier in the smaller room. My son had loved his new big bedroom. I was incredibly happy much of the time but my ex and his family played my son like a pinball machine and would deliberately set him off. I hate my ex for his Father’s Day stunt, That had really done a number on our son. It was so calculated. My daughter disagrees with me but I saw him as positively gleeful from my vantage point, as he announced to the children he was moving interstate the next day.(Father’s Day)

After a week of dealing with their devastation I had unleashed my fury and told them the truth, that he had been planning the move for years. We had the same internet account and I had seen he had been looking at houses interstate years previously. I had cried for the children when I had realised they were being discarded.

I had also been surprised to see soft porn in the internet history.

J. Geils Band – Centerfold (Official Music Video)

I had asked my son whether it was him. I was OK with it but it wasn’t him. My stance has always been, it’s better to get a magazine then it doesn’t affect anybody else. I found the Playboy laying around our rental digs when I was still single, hilarious.

I hate him for what he did to our son, Even when he did have him to stay, he had treated him as a lackey for his family. That was when my son had walked 17 km home. It had felt like that was his coming of age. He was becoming his own man.

It hadn’t taken much though for a girl to reopen his old wounds. It was probably necessary. I had always said I would rather they both had issues whilst I was still around to help. I was alone in Australia when I had faced my biggest challenges.

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