God Gave Me A Miracle

The book which sits proudly on my shelf in pride of place, sorry I know I should say bible here but it is actually ‘The L Shaped Room. It is a book which really resonated with me. I have always secretly yearned for an L Shaped Room and for a while I wanted a Toby. I guess I went for the Anti-Toby in the end. I wanted to have John next door and be surrounded by the cast of colourful characters, without the bed bugs of course.

Somehow I got hold of a second-hand copy which appears to be really special. I wrote to Lynn Reid Banks. To my surprise she wrote back. I can’t tell you how much that meant to me. I wanted to reproduce her email for my blog but I won’t do it without her permission. It is a trilogy of books. In the first book she is unmarried and pregnant and living in very basic digs.

Yet she survived and God showed he was with her every step of the way. Remembering the book helped keep me going through my own “hopeless” situation.

In the beginning her situation is totally hopeless. Yet the nightmarish digs with its bed bugs and strange characters proved to be her Salvation. I actually asked my mum for the film. She bought it for me. I had read the book first while I had been on my way to and from work on the bus and suffering probably my worst ever broken heart. They do say The First Cut Is The Deepest I really pined away, so much so that one of my flatmates was concerned enough to write me a letter. I still have that letter today. I think I have even shown it to my youngsters and explained it to them. I was so grateful to her.

The break up of my marriage was different. I had yearned to be free for years. I knew I had given it my all. I was affected by the deliberate trauma inflicted more than anything else. It’s not like a heartache more like like having been in some kind of accident. Ì was in a haze.You wake up from a narcissistically abusive relationship and you just don’t know who you are any more. I know one day I will be grateful for that relationship too but for now that is a way off as it quite literally nearly killed me body and soul.

Without that first cut I would never have survived the last twenty plus years. I had learned resilience. I actually feel a bit silly ,now for having been so ridiculous about such a brief relationship now he is just somebody that I used to know.

Somebody That I Used To Know Gotye

Source: Gotyemusichttps://youtu.be/8UVNT4wvIGY

See also:https://familytreeourstory.com/2022/08/07/god-gave-me-a-miracle/

The L Shaped Room

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