Innocence Lost

Walking around everywhere at all hours, was just something I did. It used to drive my parents nuts.

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I did have a few nasty scrapes but I am or at least was, pretty street smart.

I mean I would walk through The Old City in Jerusalem, totally alone. Generally I felt safe, except for the occasion a bunch of guys had gathered behind me, telling me I had dropped something. I probably had, but there was no way I was headed back into their little throng, to collect whatever it was.

When Jill Meagher had been murdered, it  had really made me think about the way I had lived my life. I would have probably walked those fateful few hundred metres home unaccompanied too, just as she had.

I have been to Ireland many times. The Irish are always so sociable and friendly. I watched Jill chat happily to strangers (from surveillance  camera footage) as she headed on her way. I thought how typically Irish. She had done nothing wrong. I do confess I would likely have started screaming, immediately any guy came anywhere near me at two in the morning but other than that, I realised how easily, I could have found myself in her shoes. Yet somehow I had always trusted God to keep me safe.

However, I had nonetheless found myself trapped in a situation (my relationship) which was very unsafe and I was not dealing with a stranger in a dark alleyway. My faith in God took a serious hit. I know I would never have survived without him watching over me but it had damaged my trust.

It wasn’t just the abusive individual, it was all the enablers, who destroyed my faith in human nature. The world changed for me long before Covid-19.

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