The biggest question you are left with when you have connected with a narcissist, is often “Why?”
As Dr Ramani explains here, asking them why is never a good idea.
We took many photos and going back through them today, I had remembered that I had worked out long ago, at least one reason why. Frustration when their life did not seem to going according to schedule. I had discovered that the worst blow-outs occured roughly every seven years, in tune with life stages. The last one however had occured just over a year early. I believe that final explosion happened because of my life stage, not his. I had told him that the gig was up and his threats were now ineffective. Of course I had naively thought he would settle down and we would have our “Happily ever after..” For him however this had meant something quite different..
If you are in or have been in a long-term toxic relationship, it might be worth looking at the timeline.
Source: DrRamani https://www.youtube.com/user/DoctorRamanDurvasula