I have two young adults in my life who sometimes, ask me for dating advice. I realised my own dating experiences had been a disaster and had ultimately led me to a failed marriage. This is where I am glad we are in the twenty first century.
What does a flummoxed mother do in the twenty first century ?
Answer: You Tube.
I have come across a you tube dating coach called Shallon Lester. Boy has she opened my eyes. Wish she had been around a few decades ago. She might have saved me a lot of heartache. I used to tell myself many stories, when a guy ghosted me (was not aware of the term in my day) or just took my number and didn’t call. Shallon gives us a reality check.
Girl just move on.
I think she helps young girls build a healthy self esteem. She tries to teach us to value ourselves a little more.
She does not put things delicately. Where were you Shallon when I was waiting anxiously for that phone call or thinking that a guy, who regularly flirted with me, would one day become the love of my life. I am pretty sure I would not have ended up in a toxic abusive relationship, if I had Shallon Lester in my life a few decades ago. I actually like her. It is refreshing to come across somebody absolutely willing to take risks and state a few unfortunate truths. Truths many of us, or at least me, could only seem to learn through decades of suffering.
Sorry guys, I am writing from a female perspective here. I also have a son, so I have watched a male deal with the tumultuous dating landscape too.
The gist I get is, if they really like you, they will do something about it. If they don’t, forget it and them.
She is also pretty practical when it comes to talking about actual relationships. She basically seems to suggest that many of us seem to put up with way too much, well you know …
Do I agree with everything she says?Probably not.
(She has certainly introduced me to some very modern terms, which I was shocked to discover my daughter already knew)
but I think some of her advice may actually save lives…
Watching your daughter being collected by her date, feels like handing over your Stradivarius to a gorilla.
With apologies to gorillas.
Quote by Jim Bishop. Source:Brainyquote