Boundary setting can be overwhelming at first, especially in the face of what can sometimes be huge opposition-one teeny, tiny boundary but enforced with consequences.
My grandparents were married for fifty years. My wonderful grandfather(a lovely, gentle man, whom I adored) had made the huge mistake of criticizing(perhaps in a less than tactful manner) the way my feisty grandmother had ironed the creases on his trousers. That was it. My grandmother, whom I always knew to keep everything immaculate, had never ironed another pair of trousers again, throughout the entire duration of their long and (in all the time, I knew them) happy marriage.
This may sound drastic but everybody has their particular dealbreakers. Boundary setting is about discovering ours. Yes I hear everybody talking about forgiveness. To my mind this is not about holding a grudge, this is about setting limits and showing what you will and will not tolerate.